All The Fun Of The Despair [AI Art Generation]

Working with an art generation AI, at least one that is freely available on Google Play Store but in crippleware form, is strangely like rubbing a lamp and coming face to face with a genie who informs you in booming, mystical voice "You may have five wishes per day. To unlock unlimited wishes, subscribe to Genie Pro. Also some categories of wish may require in-app payments."

The striking and not-at-all-contrived similarites do not end there. As with making wishes for genies, at least in my experience, when making up prompts for art AIs the wording matters - and it's hard to know what words or phrases will make a difference, let alone what will lead to a result close to your actual wish. As with genies, always assume that the art AI wil interpret your wish in the most unhelpful way possible, so try not to give wiggle room. You could of course experiment with hundreds of alternative phrases but then you would need to pay the subscription fees or risk running out of wishes too quickly.

"Artists staring sadly into the abyss"

Sci-Fi Gene (with minor assistance from Wonder AI), 2022

Digital

On the other hand, if you are willing to perservere, then at least sometimes your wishes really can come true. At least if your wishes are to see medieval cities made out of cheese.

"Busy medieval city made of cheese"

Sci-Fi Gene (with minor assistance from Wonder AI), 2022

Digital

I asked Wonder AI to come up with posters for some of my films, using the titles as prompts and the Cinematic AI. The results are... interesting.

"Last Zombie Standing" - does indeed feature one standing zombie and has created a decently creepy atmosphere, or at least has bunged some gaslamps around the place. Other zombies are present but one is sitting on a ledge and one is leaning on a wall so neither are technically standing. Wonder AI has delivered on the brief and I would have been happy to use this poster.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is not at first glance a film about camera equipment at all - it's a lighthearted (but adult) LEGO-animated comedy about a top-secret experimental drug that allows a failing writer to access 1% of his brain.

But AI is more powerful and more insightful than you might think. Wonder AI has correctly deduced that my film is in fact a sharp and unapologetic satirical deconstruction of the entire film industry, taking particular aim at the two most over-used cinematic techniques of all - foreshadowing and the focus pull. As an auteur it's nice to be understood once in a while.

Meanwhile my over-long title has nothing at all to do with drugs: it's a reference to the regular and highly delusional claim made by Kino London club organizers that they could, through their extensive industry contacts, score cheap equipment for filmmakers. And indeed, were you to take them up on their offer you could well end up with something like the device featured in the poster.

"Steampunk Girl" while I cannot fault Len Peralta's original artwork for John Anealio's song, which appears in the final reveal at the end of my lyric video, this image comes a close second. I was particularly impressed to see that Wonder AI has perfectly captured the steampunk vibe without hypersexualizing the image, and without resorting to the most obvious genre tropes: no brass goggles, and not a single cogwheel. What happened to Steampunk Girl's left arm is a question to be answered in the prequel.

You can watch all three films on my Short Films page here.

Brain The Size Of A Planet [Review: Lucy]

According to modern science I use 100% of my brain, although not necessarily all at the same time. According to Hollywood - yet again - we all use only 10% of our brains, and unlocking the full 100% could give us godlike powers. I worked hard to deconstruct this myth in my award-winning* short film "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" so I am a little disappointed that the rest of you haven't moved on. What do you all have for brains? Pudding?

In Luc Besson's new film Scarlett Johansson plays Lucy, a tourist who is kidnapped by drug traffickers and receives an unintended dose of an experimental product that has been surgically implanted in her abdomen. As the drug boosts Lucy's intelligence and strength she manages to escape her Triad captors, but as her telekinetic powers grow she realises she only has a limited lifespan, and she must find a way to stay alive - and stay human - long enough to do something meaningful.

However, about a third of the way through Lucy, I realised that unlike Limitless, it isn't really about brainpower at all. Once this becomes clear it's possible to sit back and enjoy a pleasantly surreal experience. The brainpower story is just background styling for a plot that's about achieving potential in a much more general sense. Besson loves his technobabble - and what's not to love, especially when delivered by university lecturer Morgan Freeman.



*Kino London Film Of The Week (April 15th 2012) an award which, as far as I am aware, Luc Besson has yet to receive.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: SHORTz

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" will be screened at SHORTz short film and music night on 2nd June at East Bloc, Hoxton. Details here.

Veni Vidi Vici [St Albans Film Festival]

On arrival in St. Albans it became clear that the town has been invaded: the purple, Clockwork Orange inspired branding had infiltrated shops, restaurants and pubs acting as temporary venues.

I planned to make the most of my filmmaker's pass over the three days. I managed to attend workshops on directing actors, stop-motion animation and the indie filmmaker's journey, as well as the 18 plus and student short film screenings and Jan Harlen's documentary Stanley Kubrick - A Life In Pictures before heading on to the awards ceremony and party at Havana. There were too many clashes however - in particular I would have liked to see the pre-release screening of Vinyl that opened the festival.

The 18 plus screening was varied - after all, your film can be 18 plus for several different reasons - sex, violence, drug references and so on. However many of the films featured blood, guts and gore - all tastefully filmed of course... I was happy with the reception for We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear and got some good feedback afterwards. Of the selection my favourites were Tim Kent's Two Persons Max for it's strong performances, and Saw Misgivings directed by David Lilley, a Saw-inspired black comedy.

I'm beginning to see how each festival has it's own feel. I was impressed by the St. Albans volunteers - not unlike the Olympic and Paralympic Gamesmakers, all the volunteers I met were enthusiastic and friendly, passionate about hosting a cultural event in their region, and even though I was only the maker of a film with a crew of four and a budget of £10 I still felt welcome. Incidentally I can't complain I was out-budgeted - the winner of the main short film category, Gracious Awakenings, was also made for £10.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: St. Albans Film Festival

Exciting festival news: "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is on the Official Selection for the first ever St. Albans Film Festival and will be screened on Saturday 9th March as part of the Over 18s short film night. See the full programme and find out more about this ambitious new film festival here.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: Tight Shorts Club

I'm looking forward to a screening of "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" at the Tight Shorts Film Club, at the Wenlock and Essex in Islington, on 26th February. You can find out more about this regular film event and annual competition here.

We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear [Trailer]

Trailer for my animated short film "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear." I've taken the full version offline (temporarily) so this will have to be your Lego fix for the moment. More news about this film soon...

We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear [Poster]

“We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” Screening: A Voyage Through Animation

On September 16th “We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” joins a diverse line-up of animated films at Whirlygig’s A Voyage Through Animation, at the Yard Theatre in Hackney Wick. This night is part of the Scala Beyond programme of film events around the country, and looks to be an exciting screening with many of the films re-scored to live music.

“We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” Screening: Braine Hownd

 “We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” is up for a screening at Braine Hownd Film Night, September 4^th at the Hideaway, near Archway. In addition to a great selection of short films the line-up also includes a premiere of Braine Hownd’s own sitcom pilot “Off The Charts.”

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Competing For Shooting People Film Of The Month

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is an entry in Shooting People's Film Of The Month contest. In the final round, the top 5 films will be judged by Plan B but the first round is a public vote - if you liked it, please visit, vote and share. As an incentive, if we make it to the final round then I promise to make the sequel ;)

[Post script 24.8.12: We didn't make the final round so plans for a sequel have been shelved for the moment. Congratulations to the finalists]

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" FILMSshort Finalist

There's only one international competitive event that really matters this summer - so on behalf of Team GB I'm proud to announce that "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is a finalist in the FILMSshort Summer Competition 2012. You can see all eight finalists on the FILMSshort facebook page.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: Portobello Pop-Up Cinema

Possibly the trendiest screening yet of "We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" will be at Portobello Pop-Up Cinema on Friday 20th July. As part of the London Lo-Fi season, the evening's entertainment includes a selection of Kino London shorts followed by the 1950 classic "Night And The City."

Brighton Run

Short film nights come and go, but MovieBar in Brighton has been running continuously for about six years. It takes place monthly, upstairs at the Caroline of Brunswick, in a neighbourhood where even the local graffiti artists have a sci-fi sensibility.

In addition to “We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” the line-up on 4th June included a Molly Brown double bill of “May Be Side Effects” and “How To Get A Flat Stomach Instantly,” Jim Scott’s brilliant robots 'n' rednecks music video “Purity Of Heart” by Pearson, and Natalie Smith’s extremely dark “Shed.”





You can read about the full line-up here.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: Smoke Yourself Slim

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is on the programme for the Smoke Yourself Slim July Film Festival on 4th July, at the Winchester in Angel.

I had to include this extremely groovy poster from a previous Smoke Yourself Slim event:

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: MovieBar

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" will be screened at MovieBar short film night on 4th June, at the Caroline of Brunswick, Brighton. There will also be time for some Q&A with some of the filmmakers.

Here's the full line-up for this event.

Legoless Part II: Walking With Legos

I can’t claim that We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear is a zero-budget film as I spent about £10 on Lego minifigs. What can I say? Invest in people.

So what was it like on set? The human voice-over cast were a joy to work with. However I have to admit that the Legos themselves were a little demanding at times: not satisfied with the usual personal assistants, crystal healers or deliveries of fresh flowers, Eddie’s rider included his own personal fire station, airport and medieval castle.

We Can Get You includes the first intimate scene I have directed: surely an anxious moment for every director? When filming intimate material it’s important that your cast have a good working relationship and can trust each other, and to find an opportunity to sit down with them and discuss what they are comfortable with. In the end I needn’t have worried: Eddie and Tanya approached the scene with a great deal of professionalism and I think it shows in the final cut.

After firing three voice coaches and a team of body language experts I have concluded that Legos talk with their hands and this cannot be changed. Is this a Danish thing? I have no idea.

Kino London Calling

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" is Kino London's film of the week. Thanks guys! Indeed I should point out that if it weren't for the Kino London house rules this film might never have been made.

Legoless Part I: Dispatches From The Set

After the screening of “We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear” at Rotoreliefs, several questions about the making of the film came up in the Q and A. I’d like to share a couple of lessons learned: this article is about the technical side of things, and in Part II I'll write about the reality of working with Legos.

Set construction was the most time-consuming part of making the film. Each of the five locations took one night shift to build and shoot: as with other films, write for the minimum number of locations, and build your sets for multiple scenes if you can. Also (and I learned this the hard way) make sure you’ve got every single shot you need from each set before demolishing it to build the next one.

There are three basic principles of Lego filmmaking: stabilize, stabilize, stabilize. Use anything you can find: sellotape, superglue, blu-tack, nails, radioactive slime – anything to reduce shake between frames. The good news: Lego isn’t only good for on-screen antics – it’s also ideal for constructing ad-hoc camera rigs, tripods and dollies. A few minutes stabilizing your set and camera saves hours of frame-by-frame adjustment in post.

One more thing: watch out for Lego injuries: constantly handling all those sharp edges is hard on the skin.

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" Screening: Rotoreliefs

"We Can Get You Some Really Cheap Gear" will be back on the big screen at Rotoreliefs short film night, at Rich Mix on Monday 26th March.