Remember cardio... and the double tap
No amount of Irish dancing will save you
Take a cruise on a replica of the Titanic? Sure - there's no way that could go badly wrong...
Always renew your antivirus subscription
Don't worry - air travel is really safe nowadays
(Snakes On A Plane)
Carry your umbrella at all times
(The Day After Tomorrow)
...and some fairly strong headache pills
Your perfect match is out there waiting to be found
It's a hard, lonely life being a superhero
(My Super Ex-Girlfriend)
but most of all...
Always be the person at the front of the queue
(The Human Centipede: First Sequence)